Are you a nervous delegator? How to let go without losing control
A nervous delegator is a leader who hands over work, and then can’t quite let go of it. It takes time to trust people, so you either keep the work or watch it so closely that you may as well have kept it.
It’s one of the first things I ask clients to look at, because it swings both ways. Some nervous delegators overwhelm their teams by dumping work at the last minute. Others underwhelm them by never giving them anything that matters. Either way, you stay busy and your team stays stuck.
Signs you might be one
- You think “it’s faster if I just do it” several times a week.
- You redo work after someone hands it in.
- Your team brings you decisions they could make themselves.
- You can’t take a day off without checking in.
Why smart leaders hold on
Usually it’s about more than time. You were rewarded for years for being the person who gets it right, so your identity may be tied to doing the work. There can be some fear there too: if the team doesn’t need you for this, what are you for? That question is worth looking at honestly.
How to start letting go
- Start with one task. Choose something that matters a little and that you do often.
- Hand over the outcome. Explain what good looks like and why it matters, and let them decide how to get there.
- Agree on check-ins up front. A set time to review stops you from hovering and stops them from guessing.
- Write it down. A simple procedure means you won’t need to explain it again, and it makes the work easier to pass on.
- Accept “different.” Before you correct something, ask whether it’s wrong or just not how you’d do it.
Done well, delegation is one of the ways you show people they’re trusted. As one client, a CEO and founder, put it, the goal is for your team to own their tasks so you can focus on what only you can do in the business.
If you want help with this, it’s a regular topic in executive coaching and leadership coaching. You can also get a quick read on where you stand with the leadership self-check.
Tell me what’s going on. We’ll start there.
A coffee chat is a free, 30-minute, no-pressure conversation online about what you’re dealing with and whether coaching is the right next step.